Why I fired my secretary…

Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn’t feeling too good that morning. I went down to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say  ‘Happy Birthday dear!’, … and probably have a present for me.

As it turned out, she didn’t even say good morning, let alone happy birthday. I thought, well, that’s wives for you, … the children will remember. The children came in to breakfast and didn’t say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, ‘Good morning, Boss, Happy Birthday.’ And I felt a little better that someone had remembered.

I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said,

‘You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it’s your birthday, let’s go to lunch, just you and me.’

I said, ‘By George, that’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!’

We went to lunch. We didn’t go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said,

‘You know, it’s such a beautiful day. We don’t need to go back to the office, do we?’

I said, ‘No, I guess not.’

She said, ‘Let’s go to my apartment.’

After arriving at her apartment she said,

‘Boss, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.’

‘Sure!’ I excitedly replied.

She went into the bedroom and, … in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake..

…followed by my wife, …

and children..

..dozens of our friends, …

and they all singing Happy Birthday……



And I just sat there . . .

on the couch . . .

naked…